What is a South Park Conservative?

Some Freedom-Loving Tunes
Chill out and listen to some songs with a freedom-loving conservative message.

Democrats Stole the Election!
With sources like these, liberals can't possibly deny the truth.
Liberals on Karl Rove
"Rove's a Nazi.", "One word: DIEBOLD", "Rove is a con artist"

Don't Hire an Alcoholic
... to replace a social drinker and don't elect liberals to spite Republicans.
Taxes and Terror
Republicans Need to Talk about Democrat’s Policies to Win.

News Alert
Harry Reid Hides Real Estate Deal, Hangs Up on AP.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Taxes and Terror

Republicans Need to Talk about Democrat’s Policies to Win



We hear about the faults of the Republican Party, of which there are many, every day in dozens upon dozens of mainstream media reports. Still, few Americans even know what Democrats are for. Republicans need to talk about the Democratic Party agenda, which South Park Conservative graciously has compiled for your convenience.

First, Democrats are in favor raising taxes. Representative Charlie Rangel, who would take over the Ways and Means Committee has said, “I cannot think of one' of President George W. Bush's first-term tax cuts that merit renewal”. They opposed Bush’s tax cuts in 2001 and 2003. Democrats would certainly increase taxes both the upper and middle class, using the explanation that the nation needs “shared sacrifice” in wartime. Democrats would bring back the death tax, raise the capital gains tax, and raise the dividend tax. Unfortunately, liberal economics is the art of explaining why your predictions haven't come true. I'm looking at you Paul Krugman. The Democratic Party's liberal policies would devestate the economy.

Second, Democrats are in favor of increasing government spending. Universal health care alone would cost hundreds of billions of dollars every year. Everyone knows that Democrats increasing spending is as old and reliable a tradition as Ted Kennedy getting drunk on the Senate floor every Christmas, so I’ll move on.

Third, Democrats are in favor of giving terrorist suspects more legal protection. The NSA would lose the ability to listen to international terrorist conversations if the U.S. is on one side of the conversation without first obtaining a warrant. High level Al Qaeda terrorists would be banned from “humiliating” treatment or any other treatment not fitting of an honorable POW, making it impossible to obtain any information from the most murderous and knowledgeable terrorist leaders. Al Qaeda’s interrogation policy will remain torture followed by decapitation. Furthermore, sensitive evidence that proves terrorists guilt will not be admissible unless we agree to give terrorists who have not yet been convicted access to top secret American intelligence. Liberals must love the Bill of Rights so much that they are creating one for terrorists.

Fourth, Democrats are in favor of immediate withdrawal from Iraq. Ask a liberal what policy they think is most likely to lead to victory in Iraq and they will be speechless at the concept that we should even address the question. The only question in liberal Democrats' minds is, “How do we get out?” As in all liberal philosophy, the consequences of their actions are not as important as doing what feels good.